HEROICS @ 8 SHREE

5 idiots staying together for 2 years does sound quite promising. Promising in the sense of senseless, stupid funny irrational acts. And trust me we overdid the promises. We can only be overdone by the politicians in the country… for the rest we really set a few unbeatable benchmarks… So lets be nice and name them aaaaaassssssssss (DRUM ROLL):-

“THE HEROICS OF 8 SHREE”

Let’s start off with the HUNTERWALI… the king/quenn of seductive moves… Cheap dances… the one with the “PHIR WOHI SEXY BHANYAK SAPNEY’S”. MOINAK BAGCHI urf ROLU POLU urf MONU urf MOINAK HUNTERWALI urf MONIKA…

Now we were all sitting in the sitting hall I was on the ground against the wall with my back towards kitchen, JP and Aditya were on the couch and neel was there too.. I think Aditi was there as well… One chair was not taken because there was a dust bin on top of it.. Which obviously shouldn’t be there but still it was.. SO we all were talking and our dear Moinak enters pretty much lost… he comes and he sits for a while and he leaves… Nothing funny rite??? But NO NO NO… how can our lost Bagchi leave without doing anything stupid... So what happened was our dude comes to the room… picks the dust bin from the only available seat.. keeps it down .. parks his ass for a while… gets up to leave and PICKS THE DUSTBIN..PUTS IT BACK ON THE SEAT… and leaves!!!! I dunno if anyone else noticed but it was funny…

MOINAK lighting a cigarette.. now whats funny about that.. WELL THE FACT THAT HE WAS LIGHTING IT WITHOUT ANY CIGGARETTE IN HIS LIPS…dude almost burnt his lips!!!!

Now we all took our cricket very seriously I think the matches were like India vs Pakistan meeting Saas bhi kabhi bahu thi… So me and Bagchi playing … Bastard wasn’t getting out.. so I bowled I bouncer… and the next thing I see is Moinak losing his balance and falling straight through …back first .. the glass table.. . bechara table.. if u would have seen Moinak then it was like an oversized baby in a small cradle.. his head and arms lying outside the cradle and legs (in sexy shorts) dangling ouside as well, with a stupid grin on his face… That was too funny… Bagchi actually looked like an oversized Potato baby... in baniyan and shorts...We were both laughing he in his cradle and me on the floor!!!!

NOW the person up next has several names as the WOMAN KILLAH!!! The SARCI BASTARD, The GURU, DITTU… ADITU… ADITYOOHH… all permutation and combinations have been and tried… but lets stick to Aditya Gogia.

Now there was period when me, Aditya, Moinak, Deepti, Pallavi ad Kalandi used to hang out every evening. So this fine evening all of us ventured out and decided Dorabjee it is... So we went to Dorabjee and roamed around planet M and all.. then we decided to get back to CCD on F.C road… so we caught hold of 2 rickshaws and me, deepti am Moinak got into one… Aditya was left out so he decided to get into the other rickshaw with pallavi and kalandi. So as he was walking towards the rickshaw when the rickshaw started without him… What happened after that didn’t just leave us in splits but the entire MG road in splits especially our rickshaw wallah.

Aditya when he saw the auto moving away started running after the rickshaw and yelling “aye aye bhaiya bhaiya rukooooo”. Now the way he ran was hilarious.. it will be impossible to describe but still let me try..

Imagine someone swimming Free style.. you know the hand going almost round .. Alternating … now pick him up and ask him to do the same on the road.. That was gogia’s hand movement (desperately trying to catch the rickshaw).. Now when the left hand swings the head swings to the right and when the right hand swings the head moves towards left so the entire movement of the head is like a pendulum.. so when the head is to the right the left hand is swinging and when it is to the left the right hand swings… And now the legs were classic.. Imagine a cyclist in the last leg of the race the circular action of his legs... now the same action but the thighs come up to almost parallel to the ground … and when the foot touches the ground and leaves it the left one goes further to the left and the right one further to the right…

SO to conclude… CRASH COURSE TO ADITYA’ S RUN: -

1. Swing your arms violently and alternately.. the swing should be a complete circle but not very complete

2. When your left hand swings move your head to the right… and vice versa… (MIND YOU ABT THE RHYTHM THAT NEEDS TO BE MAINTAINED)

3. Now the motion of your legs should be like you are CYCLING... only the thighs needs to be parallel to the ground (mind that… very important!!)

4. And when you foot leaves the ground and goes back the left foot should go further to the left and right one further to the right…

5. Its better to wear glasses and do that because then it keeps bouncing on ur eyes and u have n clue where u are running

6. You have to yell out “bhaiya bhaiya rukooooo” like a damsel in distress “NEHHHHHIIII “ or “BACHAO.. BACHAO “ types

All criterion fulfilled you will be the reason why auto wallahs on MG road will keep laughing till they reach CCD on F.C road..
(TRUST ME ITS THE FUNNIEST THING EVER… imagine Aditya running on the road like that)

“HUM OOPAR REHTE HAIN”... Aditya’s cool answer to the neighbor (who came running up pissed with the constant noise from our room yelling) who said full angrily “hum niche rehte hain”…hahahahahahhahaa


Our dear friend JP Morgan Stanley Dutta… or sirf JP had probably the funiest three incidents..

First one will definitely be the time when I got a pair of skates to 8 Shree… So Deepti and Pallavi had come over and they me , Bagchi and Aditya were talking in the sitting room… I was sitting facing the kitchen door and Moinak had the kitchen door to his right. Suddenly we hear sound of someone skating and guess who… it was JP skating.. full style and all and he starts from the room which was opposite the terrace and swishes past me Deepti and company and goes into the kitchen .. after like 2 seconds I and Bagchi saw a pair of legs parallel to the wall it remained there for a fraction of second and followed by a loud THUD more like DHUUMMMM…. We started laughing Now JP gets up .. Full restoring pride types.. Walks past us with this cool walk.. saying:-“ITS COOL DUDE.. ITS ALL COOL.. JP Man” and walks to the other room locks the door… followed by a loud “AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!”

Now JP was the most passionate cricket in the history of room cricket… He just can lose… and during his passionate arguments there were often some which defied logic, gravity and all the laws of nature and physics.. We used to play one drop one hand and the ball shouldn’t touch any part of the body… so when JP took a catch which others thought touched his body there used to be a fight and JPs arguments would be…
The ball came here it hit my palms went up I raised my arm ... it passed beneath my arm pit.. took two circles came right back to my tummy .. I sucked in tummy and hit my palm again went up... Just missed my hair came down and as it bounced on my knees but since my hand was on my knee it bounced on my hand again.. went up almost touched my nose.. but I pulled my head back.. so it went up..cicled around my head twice came down again between arm and circled my tummy and leg… and then 2mm from the ground I just caught the ball.. SO THE BALL IN THIS ENTIRE JOURNEY DIDN’T TOUCH ANY PART OF MY BODY!!!!! Yes this was the day when Einstein and Newton were doing gymnastics in their graves..

The last one most certainly was when there was some music playing in the system and then he wanted to change it and he without switching pressed the eject button for the CD to come out... and he took out the CD… so I was like dude don’t do it this way it spoils the system… So our great JP does this.. he puts the CD back... Switches on the player and plays it and then tops it and properly takes it out… and then he was like is it ok now.. I was like what the hell was that... I started laughing and I fell on the bed.. JP realized what he just did and he was like.. PLEASE PLEASE kissi ko batiyo maat… and I promise never to tell this to anyone... I will just blog about this ;)

On Neel I had already dedicate one article hence he shall get no importance at all here..

Coming to me... as perfect as I am I still am human to certain degree…

I remember this one distinctly… I was in the library with Aditya .. (YES U READ IT RIGHT... L—I—B—R—A—R—Y ) so we were on our way down the stairs when we both met Piyali Bagchi.. so we were like Hi hello types.. and that’s when I noticed a very dark patch on the side of her neck… I pointed it to her and said.. “What happened, did u get burnt???” … her face lost every single bit of colour it had… She turned PINK.. ok not exactly pink… somewhere between brown and pink… Aditya was nudging me… So I was like no dude seriously… it looks bad…It is nasty… How did you hurt yourself… She covered the patch and said bye and left in the midst of my sentence… We got down and Aditya was laughing, howling. I was like WHAATTT??? He was like idiot that’s a LOU BITE Mark… its called a Hickie (however u spell it) … and hence I lost my innocence…

The other one was when I ate a pastry in the loo so that I did not have to share it with anyone…

Other than that I was perfect… Quite perfect… Ya bastard if you are thinking of the phone incident … that will come later or will it?!??!??!! Hehehhee

So cheers to all the stupidity… So stupid yet so rocking and awesome!!!! I say KUDOS BACCHA WE ARE BASTARDS BUT WE LOVE IT MAN!!!!